Things are getting more and more eccentric at Casa de la Swain. Changing styles in my textile work, falling in love again with painting and photography...and then there is the ever illusive quest for continuing creativity through working with Eric Maisel. Still on the road teaching, posting now at the Ragged Cloth Cafe and taking the pledge to keep handmaiden up to date.

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Pitiful, Just Plain Pitiful

While focusing so much on the business end of work, and posting god knows, how many boring pictures of my humble abode, finally got everything packed. If it isn't in the suitcases, I didn't need it. However, these duties are not the problem. Today hit like a Mack truck.....I am all at sixes and seves...my chi is totally out of alignment....and just in general, down in the dumps.

Ronnie is driving me up the wall watching C-Span and other highly educational programming. I need bad t.v. You know some murder mystery with a transparent plot and questionable character development. On top of all that, why I am doing everything that needs to be done in the house and on the business front. Kelly saves my life all the time but DH is sliding right into the weave of the sofa. Is he stuffing inserts into dvd cases....no. Is he burning dvd's...no. Moral support....that's what I am getting. He trusts me to know what is the right thing to do and then leaves me to do it.
The times they are a changing.

Guess I am just in a rotten mood. Really looking forward to this trip but something is just slightly off kilter internally. Probably have been home to long and the trip will solve everything...pollyanna resides here. Worse than all of this is I can't seem to get back into my exercise routine. We may have hit the heart of the problem. Don't know why...was so good for so long and then everything just fell apart. Please give me the key to getting back on schedule....could you drop by and bust me back into the program?

Baring my soul, there is just something missing. Could be not having a chance to be in the studio.....could be the extra flab from being a slug....maybe it is doubt over the new style of work. Joy, I need joy or a good cosmo. Hopefully, my California visit will get me back on track.
Thanks for listening....no need to subject you to anymore pitiful moanings.

Next post from sunny, hot Sacramento.

4 comments:

Melody Johnson said...

I'm with you. I think it is the dog days of summer, or some such rot. I have forgotten how to be strong willed and feel lost too. My dh needs to get a routine going where he is busy and therefore I can be relieved of looking at him doing nothing. grrr
I will finish something today and write it down and then cross it off a list. Perhaps that will start a chain reaction.

Deb R said...

First of all, I liked seeing your pictures. They weren't boring.

I'm sorry you're feeling icky. I suspect you could be right about getting away from your exercise routine being part of the problem. Endorphins y'know!

I HATE to exercise. Truly. If I followed my natural inclination, I'd lie around turning into a female version of Jabba the Hut. But I can really tell a difference in how I feel, not just physically but emotionally, if I'm walking every day or slacking off and spending too much time on the couch. Sigh.

I prescribe a good long walk (or yoga session or whatever!) and a trashy novel and/or movie! :-)

And ferpetessake, why not ASK your hubby to help stuff DVD inserts while he watches TV?! Trust and moral support are lovely, but so is some concrete action.

Debra said...

Gabrielle,

You just sent off paperwork to make a major step in marketing yourself (at IQA). OFCOURSE YOU ARE AT 6S AND 7S.

You have to wait for someone to tell you that you are "acceptable" (ie. accepted).

The exercise would help with this, but nobody can push you into the machine but yourself.

When you get back from Sacto, you will work this out. And I agree with debR... Ask for what you want. From IQA and your wonderful Ronny.

Gerrie said...

It is August! Its always like this in August. It goes back to our childhood, knowing that summer is soon over and the longing for more summer and yet the anticipation of the next level in our maturation. We tend to get stuck, afraid to move forward and unable to embrace the moment. Labor day will come and go and then life will pick up speed again. Hope you have a lovely time in Sacto!!

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